Hellfire and Brimstone and Melbourne, oh my!
I don't know, what're the odds? I come away to Australia for 6 months, and then something exciting actually starts happening in East Anglia for the first time in a decade! For Christs sake! Ah well, at least I've got a watertight alibi, eh? I hope that the tabloids back home come up with something more original than the "Ipswich Ripper", though.
My kitchen-based ire has now shifted away entirely from Germans, and is blazing full force in the direction of the multitude of sloppy Asians who are inhabiting the cookery. It appears that the Koreans, in particular, have something of a gift for spot-weilding rice to the bottom of a pan. I have no idea why or how they do this. I can only assume that in aincient times, they somehow used to use cooked rice to create armour for their warriors, because this stuff is harder than bloody granite. I swear, kitchens out here should come equipped with a chisel as standard washing up equipment.
As Morgan so correctly stated earlier, we've been in Melbourne a week or so now, and it's generally a nice city. Although it appears that it is not the most geographically gifted city in the world, located as it is in the middle of a seemingly endless infirno of nearby bush. Apparently the current bushfires are the worst on record, which is hardly surprising as at the moment every natural phenomenon seems to be setting new records with ease. I'm sure that global warming is essentially the weather equivalent of steroids. Anyway, the nearby fires are gifting the city with a wonderful, smoky atmosphere. You can rarely see the sky, and everyone seems to be coughing lots. It's all terribly atmospheric, and I do rather feel like I'm living in a 40's noir film.
I had perhaps my favourite moment of the holiday thus far, earlier today. I'd nipped out to make a quick phone call, at about 8am, when out of the blue two asian guys, who were either stoned drunk or both, stumbled up to me and asked if I knew of any strip joints that would still be open. Which, you have to admit, is a hell of a lot better than Weetabix for breakfast.
My kitchen-based ire has now shifted away entirely from Germans, and is blazing full force in the direction of the multitude of sloppy Asians who are inhabiting the cookery. It appears that the Koreans, in particular, have something of a gift for spot-weilding rice to the bottom of a pan. I have no idea why or how they do this. I can only assume that in aincient times, they somehow used to use cooked rice to create armour for their warriors, because this stuff is harder than bloody granite. I swear, kitchens out here should come equipped with a chisel as standard washing up equipment.
As Morgan so correctly stated earlier, we've been in Melbourne a week or so now, and it's generally a nice city. Although it appears that it is not the most geographically gifted city in the world, located as it is in the middle of a seemingly endless infirno of nearby bush. Apparently the current bushfires are the worst on record, which is hardly surprising as at the moment every natural phenomenon seems to be setting new records with ease. I'm sure that global warming is essentially the weather equivalent of steroids. Anyway, the nearby fires are gifting the city with a wonderful, smoky atmosphere. You can rarely see the sky, and everyone seems to be coughing lots. It's all terribly atmospheric, and I do rather feel like I'm living in a 40's noir film.
I had perhaps my favourite moment of the holiday thus far, earlier today. I'd nipped out to make a quick phone call, at about 8am, when out of the blue two asian guys, who were either stoned drunk or both, stumbled up to me and asked if I knew of any strip joints that would still be open. Which, you have to admit, is a hell of a lot better than Weetabix for breakfast.
posted by Sam at 9:59 PM
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